LOL Mark,

I loved an advert for a Chinese restaurant sohwing the bloke opening the chinese cracker, the paper inside the cracker siad..

"That wasnt chicken'

Banned family guy - Simpsons!

Two teddy bears sitting in an airing cupboard

Which one's in the army?

The one sitting on the tank

Ba-da-boom tish

A tortoise witnessed 2 snails beating another up...

Police asked for a statement:

"I couldn't be too sure, it all happened so quickly"

"Do not enter. Library staff use only."

"Do not enter library. Staff use only."

"Do not enter library staff. Use only..."

*please read carefully to truly understand.

A woman arrived at a party, and while scanning the guests spotted an attractive man standing alone. She approached him, smiled and said, ’Hello. My name is Carmen.'

'That's a beautiful name' he replied. 'Is it a family name?'

'No' she replied. 'Actually I gave it to myself. It represents the things

that I enjoy the most - cars and men. Therefore, I chose ’Carmen’.'What's your name?'

He answered, 'B.J. Titsengolf.'

Who are the coolest guys in the hospital?

The ultra-sound guys!

LOL..

Just resigned as my job running a team of folks at a helium factory...

I HATED the tone that the CEO spoke to me in.

changes do happen. I know they are the trace of time , adidas f50 adizero,irresistible and inevitable. the moment I saw my father I should not recognize him.I know he is getting old ,but returning home after more than 4moths,the symptoms of old should have grown beyond my imagination. I felt guilt and regret. I know I am the killer who take away his strength and youth.apparently he was pleased that I arrived so early and brought presents for them. when I was young I always thought he was some kind of tyrant , stern and severe.Nike Mercurial Vapor, I thought he was not approachable and touching.while with years passing by, in the process of my growing up and his getting old , these impression fades and instead it is replaced by words as gentle caring and loving . he played cheese and badminton with me, he would sing with me , he cooked for me , he chat with me , he is tolerant of me.my dear father and all my families , I say sorry for my past fault , I know sometimes I just easily surrender myself to the various temptation, and lose myself and my way. but believe me , I just easily surrender myself to the various temptation, and lose myself and my way. football boots,but believe me ,my experience is added over time and I can preserve my values and trace my path to maturity